📜 Caption :

I been bored w the knowledge i know so I been tryna learn stuff I know nothing about. Was learning that time feels different based on perception, the more attention u give something the slower it seems to move, time works differently for things that are more active than others. These are all “math/science” concepts but when applying it to mental health it makes sense to me.
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Mostly been thinking about depression and how I have allowed that to rob me of my time, the thing which I value above all in the world. That which keeps you moving slow so that the world around you seems fast, makes you believe that you’ll never catch up, that your time is up, death’s tongue licking hungrily at my neck.
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But I don’t want to die before my time, I don’t want my death to feel sped up, I’ve got shit to do and I want to live to see it happen. Don’t you?
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I had been feeling bored and sad, my old self would have believed that TV and video games were my saviors, but i got tired of those too because I no longer felt like I could learn from these mediums. this is particularly true for me w the advent of streaming and triple a games (games no longer feel philosophical or perhaps they’re just harder to find because the pool is so wide).
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Don’t get me wrong, I still watch and play, I always will, but these days I try to learn something new everyday, whether its about myself or the world around me.
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This reminds me of why childhood felt slow and adulthood feels fast. I had been wondering why i keep thinking of school, why did i love it so much? Because everyday was filled with something I didn’t know. As children we are always learning, the world feels new everyday, the days feel special, our time feels slow. As adults we feel like we know everything, we predict and assume, the days feel dull, like we are waiting to die.
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I played a game a while back on Jay is Games about an office worker who did something new everyday, grey skies soon became blue. The name escapes me but it made an impact on how I want to spend my adult time.

🪞 Reflection:

Time is a seemingly simple concept but when you look into it further it’s hard to explain and even harder to observe…. Unless you’re making a near constant effort to maintain awareness.

With this character, who is unnamed for now, I wanted to personify “Time”, a tradition that many artists participate in.

Time here is represented as a human-faced being, a deep indigo color, with hair that loops together like strands of time, or like a gene sequence.

Popping out from the head is an hourglass shape, but instead of sand, the substance inside is reminiscent of lava lamps (an item I consider highly coveted).

The background was inspired by the graph paper I used to use during my public school years to draw out planes, quadratic formulas, geometry, and the like. I was not the best with Math during this period (I was also extremely insecure about this fact) and I would often use the the paper to draw my own comics and characters instead of “paying attention” (the reality being I needed specialized attention to understand the concepts).

This image represents a lot but it mostly represents an attempt to fall in love with seemingly abstract mathematical concepts. I’ve grown a lot and I understand what numbers, functions, formulas, etc are now. To put it simply, they’re cogs in an abstract engine which we use to understand life/death on earth.

🖼️ Availability: Digital image only, NFT pending, Print pending

🏷️ Tags:
#originalart #digitalart #ghost_of_color

©️ Copyright : Ghost of Color / Labrynia Alamonde / Fairy Boy / Ghostie Ghost / Arcelio C.